The tape that played over and over in my head growing up and up until a couple years ago sounded like this….
I am fat, I am ugly, I am not good enough, I don’t matter, I can’t do anything right, I am unworthy of love, I am useless….
And so it went on. This repeated in my head over and over and over. I was also spoken these things (and much worse) over my life by my peers. School was horrible for me. I was the fat girl who was also a giant and I was a very vocal Christian. I was bullied on a daily basis through elementary school and high school was no better, in fact, the guys just got meaner! I shed many , many tears back in those days.
What became a bigger problem as I grew up was that their words because my truth and the filter in which I saw myself. I hated the way I looked and I hated the person I was, when nothing was really wrong with me the whole time.
After my divorce I had no choice but to start healing but that meant going to all the places in my heart that hurt beyond those that were intertwined with my ex. And what I learned that was because of my poor self-esteem – rather, I had no self-esteem – I allowed people to treat me the way I thought I deserved to be treated and quite frankly that was like shit. I settled in every area of my life because I didn’t think I was worthy enough.
And this is where new I am statements came into play. Once I had started addressing and healing from things, it was time to start replacing all the lies I told myself with the truth. So I wrote out I am statements and I made a copy for my mirror, one on my bedside table and I made it my screensaver on my computer so I had to see them every day and say them over myself. Things like,
I am strong, I am caring, I am compassionate, I am worthy, I am capable, I am beautiful….
That last one was probably the hardest to actually say and to see when I looked at the reflection in the mirror. It took 6 months to finally see the things I was saying about myself every day. The day I had my a-ha moment was a day that set me free. Set me free from my hatred I had towards myself, set me free from the past and it catapulted me into all the goodness God had in store for me. Now the best part of all this, is that I get to now share this with you. To help you see how amazing you are, just as you are, right in this very moment.
I recently met 2 wonderful ladies who make up the company, Ibbi – Anne and Francoise. I met them at Montreal Plus Fashion week and from the moment I met them virtually via email they were so kind, encouraging and caring. Ibbi stands for “I am Bold, Beautiful & Irresistible” Their mission statement is “Transforming the World’s View of Beauty, One Plus Knit Dress at a Time” I actually got to walk for their stunning line during the show and I won one of their dresses. I obviously gravitated to animal print and a bright colour (the is the Naomi in magenta) but I tried a number of their dresses on and all I could keep saying when I tried them, was, “This dress makes me feel like a woman”. The quality is out of this world and the fit is divine.
As part of their brand they are calling women to see their own beauty and worth and share their own I Am statements. You can actually visit and complete the phrase I’m Bold, Beautiful and fill in the blank with a great word that describes you and begins with the letter “I”
I chose the word, Intrepid -look that word up, its an amazing new word I discovered. Why don’t you do yours today HERE and take the first step in starting to declare your I Am statements and start seeing how truly amazing you are! Be sure to tag them and use the hashtag #ibbiwoman
Dress: Ibbi (The Naomi in Magenta)
Makeup: Makeup By Melanie
Photos: Jose Pagan Photography