Growing up I always wanted to fit in.  I wanted to be just like everyone else and that included looking like all the images I saw in magazines, on TV and in the movies.  The only thing is, I wasn’t made to fit a cookie cutter mold.  I actually believe that none of us are meant to fit into a specific mold.  We are each uniquely made into the person you are – knit in our mother’s wombs if you will (Psalm 139:13).
If I could give my younger self a pep talk I would tell her to embrace who she was made to be rather than fighting to fit into the ‘cookie cutter’.  If I had learned this lesson early on in life I would have saved myself a lot of pain, torment and frustration and I probably would have started soaring earlier in life rather than after I was 30.  Don’t get me wrong, I have been successful in areas like my career but my heart and mind were not quite right until I hit 30 because that’s when I finally loved who I was and that reflection looking back at me.

One thing I find however in this movement of learning to love yourself and embracing who you truly are – inside and out – people can be just a tad aggressive and that comes off a little abrupt.  When I see things like “I don’t give a F*CK about your opinion” I don’t quite understand why we have to be so aggressive about that.  I mean I get the message and you are entitled to do as you wish but when it comes to loving ourselves we don’t have to be nasty to other people and in their face like that – just a pet peeve of mine.  Rant done lol

This movement of loving yourself also does not mean you start hating on others – the whole message like ‘curvy girls are better’, ‘curvy girls snuggle better’, ‘a real woman has curves’ – really gets to me.  When did our empowerment turn into hating on other women – that message is whack and serves no purpose – in my opinion anyways.

I am me and I’ve learned I’m strong, kind, loveable, compassionate, full of life, fun, I can be funny at times too apparently.  But because I’m these things it does not take away from your qualities and heck you may even have some of the same qualities or you might have some qualities that are even better and that’s amazing.  This is not a competition.

I’ve learned recently that there are some people in the industry – the plus Toronto industry even who have blocked me on social media – and for that I’m not really sure why, especially if I’ve never even met you.  But I guess I’m just not everyone’s cup of tea and hey, before that would have devastated me, made me retreat and feel bummed – but hey it is what it is and what they think does not define me.  Am I going to tell them to F off, um no – again goes back to my message above – why do we have to be so aggressive and mean about our self-love?  Instead, I’ll shake your hand when I do meet you, and love on ya and really mean it.  I don’t have enough energy to waste on hating people the way they hate.

There is so much hate in this world for who people are because they don’t fit our idea of ‘perfect’ and that pressure is something we can put on ourselves.  So let’s rethink that a bit and make a change.  Not only is it important to love you, but it’s really important to love others.  We learn to love ourselves so we really know what it is like to love and then we pour that love out to others – I mean how do you pour out love on others if you don’t know how to love the person you spend the most time with – you.  Be you, be true to you, love yourself and love others.
There is so much hate in this world for who people are because they don’t fit our idea of ‘perfect’ and that pressure is something we can put on ourselves.  So let’s rethink that a bit and make a change.  Not only is it important to love you, but it’s really important to love others.  We learn to love ourselves so we really know what it is like to love and then we pour that love out to others – I mean how do you pour out love on others if you don’t know how to love the person you spend the most time with – you.  Be you, be true to you, love yourself and love others.
I know it’s kind of weird that outfits can inspire posts like this but here is my thought process on this one….
I sat at my desk thinking what does this outfit and photo tell me? You will rarely see my just post photos for the sake of it – my message and my heart for women is more important than just flashing images in your face lol.So here we go on the rabbit hole on my thought process for this post…. for starters most people who have worn this super cool snake skin shirt with leatherette on the shoulders from Point Zero Curvy with pants and made it a casual look but I decided to style it a little differently and show off my curves a little more.  So I paired it with a high wasted skirt from Forever 21, a belt from Ardene and added some gold accessories.  Add to that that the photos are a little bit of a different style than you see and some of them even look like an oil painting (thank you Robert and your different light 😉 )  And voila – I was inspired to write about not being cookie cutter – cause I’m not and I refuse to try and fit into a cookie cutter any longer – I’m unapologetically just me.
Stay Beautiful,
Top: Point Zero Curvy 3/4 Printed Top
Skirt: Forever 21 (last year)
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Photos by Robert Skuja
All photos © 2015 Robert Skuja Photography
Makeup by Sara Bella Makeup – she not only did my makeup, she has her own line of makeup and used that! I’m in love with her stuff and she’s just all around amazing- be sure to check her out!
Eye Lashes (extensions) by Love Ur Look Beauty my official eyelash extension specialist
Hair by Lavish Salon & Spa ​